Deja Vu

Why was it that I needed to log out, view this movie -- find this movie in my database -- and log about it.

I found a woman dead, just like her. She was pretty, just like her. Only she was hanged. But she had a pretty face, just like her...in the movie.

That's where things change. She committed suicide. Our victim hanged herself.

It was one of my first, non-accident, victims. I had to write it up. That means that I had to find out the underlining cause of death. I had to run down the doctor and have him sign a "cause of death". That's difficult. The family got involved. It took days. The fact was that she was involved with drugs and wanted to die. The Dr. knew it, but, because of legal reasons, it was difficult to write out the death certificate. Doctors don't usually like to sign off on those type of things.

But, she was beautiful...or was. I'm sure she was, before her neck got stretched out. When a person hangs themselves for a long period of time, their collar bones tend to push through. Well, it makes them look...less human.

But, her face still was beautiful. Like the girl in Deja Vu. She was still...well, alive...to me. And that was the most difficult part. I picked her up from the sheriff's department and brought her back to the morgue.

I closed her eyes.

Then, the mortician asked all the young guys to leave the room. That was weird. She was naked, but dead. That was the only time I've ever been told to leave a naked body.

It made me feel weird that the mortician said that, but I obliged. But, I knew...I knew him. He has a very strong respect for the dead. And this woman, although her choice of death was not one he respected, needed the respect of the dead, even more so.

He put her to rest.

Seeing a beautiful woman like that take her own life makes me think...I can't come to any conclusions.

I'm sorry, I just can't.

Why I searched out Deja Vu in my archives, I don't know. There has to be some connection...I'm not sure what?


-- Without Wax