Thursday, May 11, 2006
It Feels Like Home
I'm sitting here with my three runny sunny side up eggs, three garlic toast, two thick slices of bacon, fresh coffee, and a smile of my face. I'm watching Jordan Two Delta (Scarlett Johansson) tell her best friend, Lincoln Six Echo (Ewan McGregor), "Your eyes are lying." The Island is my current favorite movie. The point is that I made this breakfast with money I earned in a kitchen I rent alone watching my movie on my own TV. I'm connected to the Internet by an ISP I paid for, not a borrowed signal. This is the first time I've ever had to pay for broadband; at home it was expensed to the company. I don't share this apartment with anyone and although it's a little scary being alone at this point in my program, I feel comfortable. Progress rather than perfection.
I am nine days shy of my six month sobriety milestone. I feel scared. There are so many things that I'm juggling up in the air right now that I just can't go into it.
I must go now, but will be back online tomorrow. I know it's been a long break from this blog. It's hard to explain in a short post. But please understand this: If you feel like responding to this post, your words will be charished. Whether by comment or e-mail, let me know...just what you're thinking.